Saturday, March 7, 2009

Ryan Conklin Gives Advice

Ryan ConklinIn episode nine of The Real World Brooklyn, Ryan Conklin didn't have any adventures of his own, so he was relegated to commenting on others. His roommate Chet Cannon always depended on Ryan for support and advice and he got some in this episode as did Ryan's gal pal, Baya Voce.

One of Chet's problems is that he doesn't always know what the normal parameters are in ordinary society. This can cause him to carry things too far or to say or do things that are just not acceptable. When Ryan thinks it is appropriate or when it is possible to make a difference, he intervenes to keep Chet in check.

Chet almost got in big trouble after talking to Katelynn Cusanelli about her vaginal stents. These are medical devices necessary for her to use for post-surgery dilation. Chet inappropriately asked Katelynn where she kept them, saying as a prank he wanted to hang them over someone's face while they slept. Ryan walked in and heard the word dilate and asked Chet what was meant by it. Chet explained it was used to plumb the depths of Katelynn's va-jay-jay and keep the passage wide open. Ryan's wasn't sure what it was all about but didn't want anything to do with it.

Ryan ConklinChet told Ryan his idea of using the stents for a prank. Ryan adamantly said, "No way. You're not going to touch them!" Ryan was able to see that the such a thing was intrusively sick and he made it clear in his order to Chet that it was not to happen. Ryan needs to continue to try to turn Chet away from being the sociopath that he is towards everyone except Ryan.

Continuing with Chet, in this episode Atlantic Records took advantage of the RW cameras by agreeing to let Chet "interview" the group Danger Radio so that they could be seen on the show. It was kind of sad that Chet felt "accomplished" by it. He really didn't get the concept that Atlantic Records would have been just as happy having Scott Herman's water bottle interview the group if it would get them airtime.

Later, Chet was invited to a club to watch Danger Radio perform. He brought Ryan along with him. After the performance the group talked to Chet and Ryan and Chet invited them back to the house. They agreed and the band and the roommates had an impromptu party. Ryan got the opportunity to sing his "1863" song for them and they and everyone of course enjoyed Ryan's work.

Ryan ConklinAt some other time, Chet needed a head shot, which JD Ordonez agreed to take. Ryan provided posing advice to Chet and was asked by Chet for inspiration. Ryan gave "inspiration" by pulling down the back of his pants, exposing his surprisingly non-hairy bottom. How this was inspiration for Chet to look happy is left to the imagination.

With Baya Voce, Ryan's advice was only to the camera and not to her directly. She had auditioned for the Hip Hop Conservatory but she had declined the acceptance. Ryan wasn't aware of that and had previously asked Baya when she was going to start. Baya explained that their instructional style seemed similar to that of the military and it was not for her, so she decided not to join.

Ryan wasn't happy about it because his philosophy is never to quit and to prove to yourself that you can do things you thought you couldn't. He mentioned that the military doesn't allow you to quit and that's a good thing. He thought that Baya had a history of giving up, so he said about her, "Somebody needs to slap her! And like [tell her] Baya! Work! Harder!"

Ryan ConklinThree things about Ryan's harsh assessment of Baya: 1) you can tell in his eyes that he is saying what he is saying not because he looks down on her, but rather because he cares about her and her future. 2) Ryan forgets that when he said that the military is not for everyone, that also means that their instructional and motivational styles are definitely not for everyone either. 3) Ryan has only tried a few things in life and they are things that he found worthy of seeing through to the end. He hasn't discovered yet that in life sometimes you need to try different things and if they don't work out you need to stop and try something new instead.

Most non-surprising moment of the episode: Chet summarized his life and career by saying, "I feel like I am a celebrity in my own mind. And it's a good feeling." Would that we all could travel to that alternate universe that is Chet's mind and bask in our own imaginary greatness.